My Grass is Pretty Green

Recently I was reading another girl's labor story and it made me reflect on my own. When someone asks how it was I usually say, "Terrible. Awful. Horrendous. 22 hours of painful labor with no pain meds just to get cut open." They ask why I got a c-section and I tell them because just about everything that could go wrong did: failure to progress, baby facing the wrong way, baby's head pushing on the cervix and both the head and cervix swelling up, baby passing meconium. I think about being pregnant again, and then I think again- I was not a fan of the nausea, the total lack of energy, not being able to do all the things I am used to and all the weird things your body does.

But when I think about her delivery and post- delivery, I suddenly feel very ungrateful and ignorant. Yes, I had a painful labor and wasn't able to deliver naturally like I wanted to. But my life was never once in danger, and as frustrating as some of it was, it was mostly all normal delivery stuff. Yes, my baby had to go to NICU for monitoring for aspiration pneumonia and I didn't get to see her for her first 3 hours, but she was completely healthy and it was only 3 hours. No, I didn't have the easiest pregnancy, but I can have another child again, anytime I want to.

This has been an awesome reminder to me to be grateful for what I am given- and I have SO MUCH to be grateful for.